I have been going through what I would describe as a funk. Not feeling like myself, not having motivation, not sticking to my healthy routine as of late. Sure, the holidays always thwart that! I usually don’t mind the holiday season setting me off a bit. I think this year because it started before the season and has been lingering, it’s taken its toll on my emotional tolerance threshold.
As a counselor, I am supposed to know the steps to take to get out of these funks. I have great advice for you to help yourself when you’re in a rut. But, it’s sometimes that ol’ saying of “those who can’t do, teach!” Not all the time, but I am human and it is WAY harder to take your own advice, even when you’re an expert on it. I have heard this from nurses too. They don’t take themselves to the doctor when they should, or their self care isn’t always top priority. I feel like this is a common woman thing too! We all are so used to taking care of others, but forget to take care of ourselves. It’s funny how that works. We are our own worst enemies!
Sometimes, I have funky days, sometimes I have funky weeks, sometimes it last longer than that. This one has lasted, and yesterday was the first time I was able to fully take on the task of making myself feel better. There have been so many times I have thought and thought about what I should do or what I need to do, but I have ended up most days feeling even worse because the guilt factor comes in like “Why, when you know the right things to do, aren’t you doing them??” I get frustrated and down on myself about being frustrated and down on myself. LOL! The cycle….
I am learning, or trying to learn, to stop kicking myself when I am down. One of my favorite Yogi’s on the planet is Yoga with Adriene. She’s just super cool, laid back, and seems to always know the right thing to say when I need it most. She has used the phrase, “Honor where you are” before, and there is something that resonates SO STRONGLY with me in that message. It really helps me remember that where I am is where I am. There is nothing wrong with it, it is just where I am in that moment or at that time in my life. I think back to this mantra often when I need a good reminder that plain and simply, IT’S OK!
So yesterday, I took a luxurious bubble bath. It relaxed my body and my mind. I even meditated using the amazing app Head Space for the very first time. It was 5 mins at the end of my bath time, but it was exactly what I needed to just get out of my head, and just be where I was.
I followed that with some journaling. Nothing helps me more than setting intentions and goals on paper. It doesn’t make you actually do the things you write down, but it really helps focus your mind on what it is that you need or want at the time. I journaled my 2018 year plan, I manifested, I wrote down my desires and things I want to work on, and continued with jotting down some big life goals too. This process led me to writing down what I wanted to accomplish each day this week. Although writing down my big goals is great, I find that making short term daily goals or weekly goals really helps not overwhelm me. It also helps me get back to a routine and allows me to take baby steps to my bigger goals. I was able to plot out my meals for the week AND my workout schedule. Confession: I have not been working out like I used to and my nutrition has taken a turn for the worst. I KNOW when I am on track with these things, I feel better both body-wise and self-esteem-wise so getting these things in check is a huge priority right now.
Writing these things out than led me to do a mini-meal prep for the rest of the work week. I usually prep my meals every week and work out six days out of seven days, so I have been way off lately. But I am finally taking steps to help myself do what makes me feel good. Man, did it feel good to be productive.
I woke up this morning, first day back at work after the holidays, at 4:40am. I didn’t snooze. I made a choice; snooze and be more tired and possibly miss my workout window OR just get up right then. What does that extra 10 minutes REALLY give you anyway? I was able to get up and do a 5:00am workout for the first time in months! I even added another 5 min meditation in my morning too! My breakfast and lunch were prepped for the day, my body felt awake and happy, and my mood had suddenly shifted from down to up. I felt better about myself because of the choices I made to help me feel better.
My point: I am ok that I wasn’t ok. I am ok that I had some setbacks and wasn’t able to be the best version of me for awhile. I am ok that there are times in my life that “I just can’t”. I will honor where I was, and am honoring where I am now. It is ok to be in a funk, it’s ok to have days or even months where you just are not where you want to be. Just remember: don’t live in that space forever. Take steps, even if it’s been awhile, to get out of that funk! Baby steps can lead to giant leaps in the right direction. My first steps, led me to take more, which led me to take more. Inertia is our friend. Stop, breathe, honor where you are, but then move one inch in the way you want to go. Happiness is not a constant, it’s a practice. It ebbs and flows. It takes work. The best thing you can do is learn what works for you and get back to those things when you able to push just one step in the right direction.